This Post is Brought to You By Birth Control

**Disclaimer:  I absolutely adore my children.   I really have no intention of stopping at 2.  I esteem mothers, revere parenthood, and consider raising kids to be a high calling and a great blessing.  That said...** In a corner of our son's room we have a wall. 

I call it "The Great Wall of Diapers."  The Great Wall of Diapers was graciously given us by friends and family over the course of the last few weeks. 

Let's talk about diaper math. 12 diapers a day = 84 diapers a week. 

84 diapers per week = 336 diapers per month.

The Great Wall of (890) Diapers, which totals more than $200, will last us less than 3 months. 

Biological clock still ticking? 

Let's talk about hormones.  I wash our sheets weekly.  This photo represents 3 mental breakdowns in the last 7 days.  That's one every other day.

Still can't stop the itch? 

Let's talk about swelling.  Cankles.  The inability to bend your toes.  Burning sensations.  Heavy bruising sensations.  Numbing.   Elephantitis.  Let's talk about stepping on the scale at the doctor's office and the nurse saying, "Oh my, you are swollen." 

And if none of that scares you away, give this a whirl: 

"Placenta, yolk sack, mucus plug, bag of waters, amniotic fluid, umbilical stump, colostrum, vernix caseosa, lanugo, meconium, episiotomy."

(dry heave) 

Bam.  Better than a cold shower.